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About Deviant Artist Member AmberFemale/United States Recent Activity
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I reach out my hand,For the help I need,
But all I grab is air, And I can feel my soul bleed,

My heart still beats, But I have become desolated,
Why do you ignore my plead, I feel so isolated,

The never ending tears, My endless screams,
Does anyone care, A terrifying dream,

Will you look at me, Will you acknowledge my existence,
My extended hand, pleads for any assistance,

I don't know who I am, I become desperate,
Clinging to the shadows, I become separate,

The real life is scary, a nightmare of reality,
My mental state changes me, Comfort me my dear loving Insanity.
Swallowing it whole,
I wait for it to take effect,
Numbing the pain,
I start to fee relieved,
I need it to survive,
I need it to prove I exist,
But I soon grow immune,
The feeling goes away,
And the pain intensifies,
Breaking down,
I don't know what to do,
How does one continue,
With this agony?
Describe my behavior, It's one simple flavor,

Insanity best suits me, I'm as free as I can be,

Care to take a tour, Go through the maze and open my door,

See what's inside, No need to run or hide,

Shall we entertain thee, In my brain you shall see,

Chaos and madness, Please ignore my sadness,

For I am not important, There is no judgement,

A mask I wear, The real me is rare,

Do you enjoy seeing this, Isn't my torment such a bliss,

Please do not try to assist, For I will surely resist,

I like my sad little world, Watch my mind get swirled,

No longer lost No longer found, Just bury me six feet underground,

Me and my delusion, Me and my illusion,

My hysteria, My dementia,

My psychopathy,
        My one and only Insanity


United States

Well been awhile since I actually edited this so im doing this now. Hi, I'm amber. I'm 17 years old and live with my mother and friend Stacia. I have two cats in whom I adore, like I dot on them all the times.

My boyfriend is :icongfgbilly: and i loves him so much. <3 we were childhood friends but ive loved him since then. and im glad i got him now. We started to date may 19 2012~ im so happyyyyyy~ :iconjoyplz:

I don't really have a religion anymore because I use to be christian but my idea of God was different then everyone's else. I know there's a God, but I believe that he is a stadistic man who loves to watch us humans struggle to survive and even tho he promises that if we stay good we can go to heaven but I do not believe that. I believe on 3 people are allowed in heaven: God, Jesus, and Mary. But everyone else is going to hell. Which is why I am no longer christian.
I hope we can get along well. I write poetry alot on here and I do not really take requests only because most people want me to write something stupid. If you want me to write you an emotional poem then I will be more then happy to, but other then that NO.
And my last name is not lamps. It was a joke my friends came up with and i went along with it.
ok. so im actually going on my formspring thingy. so ask away any question!​XxEnv…
i also made one on DA

Current Residence: California
deviantWEAR sizing preference: Medium
Print preference: black and white
Favourite genre of music: techno, musical, alternative punk
Favourite photographer: Charles Baudelaire
Favourite style of art: Emotional
Operating System: phone
MP3 player of choice: ipod
Shell of choice: nut shell
Wallpaper of choice: dark green
Skin of choice: dark green
Favourite cartoon character: Envy, Marshall Lee
Personal Quote: life is like a bitch,its something you got to deal with


Envy-You has started a donation pool!
70 / 100
just want to earn points so i can give them to those i think are worthy of them. plus i want to buy some stuff that would better help me with artwork and poetry.

You must be logged in to donate.
[x] You don't like public speaking.
[ ] You find it hard to talk to strangers.
[ ] You don't like to look people in the eye.
[ ] You hate using public restrooms. (ill use them if i cant hold it in)
[ ] You hate to go shopping alone.

[ ] Being introduced to new people makes you nervous.
[ ] When you're in a group of people, it's difficult to think of what to say.
[ ] You have a lot of trouble talking to the opposite sex.
[x] You hate to be teased. 
[x] You hate answering the door. 

[ ] You can't stand people watching you.
[/] One on one conversation makes you nervous. (if i knew the person, im fine.)
[x] You don't like to ask people for help. 
[x] You hate to read out loud. (i mess up on my words a lot)
[ ] You don't like answering questions.
TOTAL: 5.5

[ ] You dread ordering food at restaurants.
[ ] You are uncomfortable at parties, unless you know everyone well. 
[ ] You don't like to talk, because you're afraid of being embarrassed by what you say.
[ ] You wish you were more outgoing.
[ ] You hate being in the center of any room 
TOTAL: 5.5

[ ] You don't know how to react to compliments.
[/] You prefer reading, writing, or listening to music than being around too many people. (depends on my mood)
[/] You blush easily.
[x] You spend a lot of time in your room.
[ ] You don't like talking about personal things with people you don't know very well. 
TOTAL: 7.5

Overall total: 7.5

Multiply your overall total by 4 to find out what percent of shyness you are. Then title this journal entry "I am __% Shy"

I am 30%.
  • Mood: Eager
  • Listening to: i dont even know
  • Reading: Everything
  • Watching: american dad
  • Playing: PokemonMMO
  • Eating: dinner
  • Drinking: stuff

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Journal History


Add a Comment:
NayaSelenia Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy B-day! :party:
(1 Reply)
Theoddshipper Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2014
Hey do you remember me? I did a version of Pitch's Hell fire for Jack.
I did another song want to see it?
(1 Reply)
EddyEzmo Featured By Owner Feb 8, 2014
(1 Reply)
LadyNamy Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the +fav "+27.000 followers~ to C2ndy1c2d" dear!
I really appreciate it ^^! <3
(1 Reply)
LivingWorkInProgress Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Student General Artist
Thank you for the Fave on my BlackIce comic! <3 
(1 Reply)
NayaSelenia Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy B-day! :tighthug:
(1 Reply)
11KairiMayumi11 Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:party: Happy, happy birthday~ :party:

(1 Reply)
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2013   Writer
Happy birthday ^^ 

here have a cake :3 

(1 Reply)
GhostWriterV Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
happy birthday ^_^
god luck in ur future life ^_^
(1 Reply)
JinSeoYeon Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2013  Hobbyist
thx for the fave~
Shaylex Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Student Filmographer
Congrats on 2nd place! :hooray: For prizes, you may choose a sketch ROTG related of your liking and a chibi of whatever you want! Message me via note! Thanks! :heart:
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2013   Writer
You have been tagged, sorry the tag-thingy told me to..

Ka-ren Featured By Owner May 29, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the fav )
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner May 24, 2013   Writer
come and RP with me? :3
(1 Reply)
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner May 16, 2013   Writer
Hello :3
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner May 13, 2013   Writer
Back online ;3
Ka-ren Featured By Owner May 12, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the fav )
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner May 11, 2013   Writer
still alive?
(1 Reply)
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner May 10, 2013   Writer
sent, I hope you got it
(1 Reply)
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner May 9, 2013   Writer
Hey :3
ArtyThePuppeteer Featured By Owner May 6, 2013   Writer
Hey, I am on now, finally sorry if I left you waiting
Ka-ren Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the fav )
punjabAttack Featured By Owner Apr 21, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks a bunch for the fave!
Dariahn Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fav<3
akellolight Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
hugs to you
(1 Reply)
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